Welcome to the EOD portion of base113.com
This section of the site contains information on the Explosive Ordnance Disposal mission. It also contains links to the EOD photo gallery as well as a page dedicated to EOD-related artwork. A page listing some EOD techs worth taking note of is available, and since this will be the future home of the 509th Explosive Ordnance Disposal Flight, there is also a 509th EOD Roster. Take time to look around and be sure to visit the EOD area in the forum if you have any questions of comments.

May 2006 Bent Rod :

Unfortunately, the nominations for the May Bent Rod were lost before they could be posted on this site. Don’t worry though, you haven’t missed much. May was a pretty dull month, or as Radio would say, “weak… super weak.”

The winner was…

Cheap-Cheap for confusing a sleeping bat with a tarantula while deployed to Manas AB, Kyrgyzstan. His discovery of the alleged spider was so exciting (to him) that he immediately called for other shop personnel to witness the amazing creature. According to him, this is when another person declared the flying rodent a tarantula. Needless to say, these excuses and accusations were all made after he had been declared winner of the Bent Rod.
vs.

Joy is getting beat up so often by little Chuck Norris McLaughlin that she has no choice but to take protective measures for his arrival. Watch out for that roundhouse kick!!

The nominees for the April 2006 Edition of the Bent Rod are:

Muffin Man - “Mini-Golf Meltdown” While playing miniature golf in Florida, consistently shot what he calls “double par”. Eventually he got angry and just turned in his club.
Turdpedo- For including a politically charged quote in the signature block of his email. Though the Commander and First Sergeant did not seem to have any problem with this, another member of the squadron forwarded the email to the entire squadron beginning what may be referred to as the “CE Immigration Uprising of 2006″. Turdpedo has had to deal with a number of complaints and other assorted comments as punishment for his lack of foresight.
Amazing- “Dog-Sitter” For passing up a sweet TDY to Eglin AFB, Florida to dog-sit his girlfriend’s Chihuahua, which incidentally is blessed with endowments that would make a German Shephard proud.
Ogre- “Chigger Wiggin’” For refusing to pull any more weeds at the Bomb Wing building after learning of the presence of chiggers. Apparently chiggers are Ogre’s kryptonite, proving that while he has no problem charging into a nuclear weapon incident site, tiny bugs are not to be trifled with.
Recruit- “The Great Line Badge Caper” For losing his line badge and not being able to locate it for nearly a week, even after tearing the shop, his home, and his car apart. The line badge was eventually located in a place that he had already looked, leading to the recurring conversation: “Did you ever find that?” “Yes.” “Where was it?” “I found it.” “Where?” “In My Flight Suit!”
Amazing- “Death Rays” aka “Eye-F#@king” aka “Firestarter” For trying to bring about the demise of the Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force using only his eyes.
Muffin Man- “Urkel Trunks” For wearing his swim trunks around his nipples. No, he apparently didn’t do it to be funny.

I must also be noted that Ogre owes a large quantity of beer to the shop for failing to take the Bent Rod to multiple shop functions, including a dining in.

And the winner is…

Captain Amazing for attempting to use his death gaze to make the CMSAF spontaneously combust. We’re not sure if he was just having a bad day, if his superhero-like name just went to his head and he wanted to try out some of his powers, or if he simply watched Stephen King’s Firestarter the night before and got carried away.

The definition of random, and hence the laws of probability which govern it, were called into question as the 509th EOD flight drew the names of basketball teams from a hat. While the casual observer might assume that reaching into a hat and pulling out a slip of paper without knowing what is printed on it is a reasonably random procedure, Ogre pointed out that this is not really the case. When the teams are ranked and some of the top-ranked teams have already been drawn, the probability that he will draw all four #1 ranked teams diminishes considerably. This immediately negates the commonly understood definition of random. The laws of probability took another blow when Ogre managed to draw three teams ranked 11 or greater out of 22 remaining teams, 14 of which were ranked 10 or better.

Main Entry: random
Function: adjective
1 a : lacking a definite plan, purpose, or pattern b : made, done, or chosen at random
2 a : relating to, having, or being elements or events with definite probability of occurrence b : being or relating to a set or to an element of a set each of whose elements has equal probability of occurrence ; also : characterized by procedures designed to obtain such sets or elements
3 a : a process which results in a predetermined person having the greatest possible chance to achieve their desired outcome; the definition supercedes all others when the process centers around basketball and the person in question is old enough to have been present at the invention of the sport (not to mention the inventions of both the basket and the ball)